More Reasons Why Polly Is Better Than All Other Gods Put Together

Other Gods Demand You Do Strange Things

Some gods want you to gather in groups with people you don’t know, or even particularly like. Some gods want you to commit acts of pyromania by lighting candles or other things. Some gods want you to carry rugs around so you can pray on them multiple times a day. Some gods ask you to get into awkward and uncomfortable poses–such as kneeling, which can be very uncomfortable for older people. Some gods want you to perform unnatural acts–such as singing. (For most people, singing is an unnatural act. Have you heard most people sing? Anyone who’s ever heard me sing agrees it’s as unnatural as things can get.) Some gods want you to wear funny or uncomfortable costumes. Some gods tell you who you can associate with, or who you can marry, or what sexual positions you can or cannot use. Worst of all, some gods tell you to kill or otherwise persecute people you don’t even know.

Polly is informal. If it’s uncomfortable, don’t do it. If you enjoy it and it doesn’t hurt anyone else, why not do it?

Other gods make outrageous promises.

Eternal life is one of the biggest. They love to promise you that. Of course, that’s only after you die, once no one can prove it. Gods don’t promise you eternal life now. It’s too easy to prove them wrong.

Polly simply refuses to make promises she knows she can’t keep.

Other gods seem to be forgetful.

They need you to keep reminding them of things. You’d think they might remember little things like, say, having created the universe. But you have to keep reminding them of it whenever you talk to them, just in case it slipp;ed their mind.

Polly keeps better track of what she does.

Published in: on February 12, 2009 at 5:15 pm  Leave a Comment